Tag: hope

How to talk about God in flower seeds

In helping parents and friends talk about God to children as they walk along the way, today we take a Zinnia seed and explore the wonders of God. Let’s talk to the kids and bring God in ordinary things:

Do you see the seeds on the dirt in the picture?

These are Zinnia seeds. In that one flower there are more than 100 seeds. That means 100 Zinnia plants.

But, not until those seeds are put in the soil to grow. Otherwise, they will simple sit, alone.

Do you see the little baby Zinnia’s in the next picture?

Yes, they’re young and growing. All because someone, (well, in this case, it was me), took a shovel and softened the soil and took out the rocks, and then planted the seed. And then, buried it in dirt.

The seed was buried. Then the seed basically died.

Well, you see, the seed loses itself as a seed. It allows itself to become something entirely different. A living sprout.

Yes, after being watered, it starts to grow.

Life bursts forth with water, and sun, from the soil and the seed where it all began.

What a promise in each seed. A possibility of  a hundred plants from only 1 flower!

That’s what the word “glorious” means. Well, maybe not, but at least to me.

This is actually a picture of the Gospel. The Good News of God.

Yes, God speaks to us everyday through everyday things. He is the Creator of all the natural beauty around.  I suppose He’s waiting to see who’s looking for His messages from His many glorious wonders that occur throughout each day.

Well, back to the seed that died in the ground. There’s a verse in the Bible about all this in John 12:24, NLT, Jesus  speaks to those who have listening ears:

I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat is planted in the soil and dies, it remains alone. But its death will produce many new kernels, a plentiful harvest of new lives.

How is the gospel message hid in this seed? Well, It died. It gave up it’s own identity.

Jesus was God, in heaven from the beginning. God sent His Son, as the Christmas baby, with angels announcing to shepherds to be the Savior of the world.

He came that He might die.

Yes, on the cross. Have you heard the story? He died on the cross. His blood was shed for forgiveness of our sin.

But He rose from the dead! Much like this sprout that came from the seed that was buried.

Yes, Jesus rose again. This is call the resurrection. And for those who believe, He forgives and makes new everything that was old. I know it’s hard to believe, but look at the seed.

There’s a whole new look, and a whole new life, and then with time and water and sun, there’s fruit in the end. This is God’s love and life all shown through nature.

Yes, and when we believe in Him, He makes us new. God’s Word expresses this truth in 2 Corinthians 5:17,

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!

Daily, we need to die to our own stubborn way, and instead of putting ourselves first, we need to seek God, and obey His way. for example, when a guardian asks, “Can you clean up your space.”

Do we whine, and moan and put it off for a time? Or do we simply obey? And, cheerfully?

God is watching. He knows everything!

Hey, the seed picture should help move us to action. The seed died to itself, in a way, that a plant could grow. But more than that, there’s a reward in it for us.

Can you see in the picture, the reward of putting God first and doing things His way?

Yes, fruit. Well, in this case a flower. Beautiful and bright.

Have you prayed to God, receiving Jesus, and His promise of new life? Pray today with no delay, ask Him in your life. He uses a simple seed of faith, and creates beauty and life.

And maybe, you have the Lord, but need to be planted anew. Pray to God. He hears. He waits for us to talk with Him.
“Dear Lord, help us this day make the choice to put You first.

To give You some time, and forget about ourselves.

I bow my head and ask, “Will You forgive me Lord? For the times I’ve been stubborn and not cared about what’s right.

Help me to “die” to my own selfishness, and sometimes, meanness too, and lead me to care and desire about what You say.

Thank You that You gave up Your life that I might have mine. That You, Jesus, went to the cross for my wrongs. That You were willing to pay for my debt of sin. You loved me . . . then.

And You love me now.

Thanks for speaking in a simple seed that was buried in the ground, but didn’t remain like that. No, it changed and grew to something beautiful in time.

Thank You God.

Help me choose You, today. That I might have a flower’s joy.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Proverbs 4:8,9, (about gaining wisdom when we hear God’s Word),

Cherish her, (wisdom), and she will exalt you;
    embrace her, and she will honor you.
She will give you a garland to grace your head
    and present you with a glorious crown.”

Aren’t the “heads” of these flowers arrayed with glorious crowns?”

Amen, and when we obey God and seek to obey, we will have His light shining from us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Ninety and Nine, a hymn for today

Writing the words of an old hymn so we might speak aloud, or if desired, to sing. But there is so much comfort in reading words from over a hundred years back, and feeling as if they were penned today. Oh, how they shed new light on familiar themes:

There were nine-ty and nine that safe-ly lay In the shelter of the fold, But one was out on the hills a-way, Far off from the gates of gold,

A-way on the mountains wild and bare, A-way from the tender Shepherd’s care,
A-way from the tender Shepherd’s care.

Lord, Thou hast here Thy nine-ty and nine; Are they not enough for Thee? But the Shepherd made an-swer:

“This of mine has wan-dered a-way from Me, And al-though the road be rough and steep, I go to  the des-ert to find My sheep,

I go to the des-ert to find My sheep.”

But none of the ran-somed ev-er knew How deep were the wa-ters crossed; Nor how dark was the night That the Lord passed thro’

Ere He found His sheep that was lost. Out in the des-ert he heard its cry Sick and help-less, and read-y to die, 

Sick and help-less, and read-y to die.

Lord, whence are those blood drops all the way,

That mark out the moun-tain’s track?

They were shed for one who had gone a-stray Ere the Shep-herd could bring Him back. Lord whence are Thy hands so rent and torn? They’re pierced to-night by many a thorn, 

They’re pierced to-night by man-y a thorn.

But all thro’ the mount-tains, thun-der riv’n, And up from the rock-y steep, There a-rose a glad cry to the gate of heav”n;

“Rejoice! I have found my sheep!”

And the an-gels echoed a-round the throne, Rejoice for the Lord brings back His own, 

Rejoice for the Lord brings back His own.

Elizabeth C. Clephane had written a poem that found it’s way in 1874 in a penny newspaper of those days. Ira D. Sankey, a song leader for Evangelist D.L. Moody, cut it out and put it in his music notebook.

At a meeting in which Moody gave a sermon on the Good Shepherd,  he asked Sankey, “Do you have an appropriate solo in which to close?”

It is told that Ira Sankey prayed a quick prayer and turned to the poem in his notebook, and, on-the-spot, wrote its melody!

Today, so many years later, melody known or not, the words comfort, touch, and move us to hope deeper and believe greater in our dear Good Shepherd’s love. We must read it aloud and rejoice in our hearts that our Good Shepherd never tires to seek and to save the lost.

The old hymns, they remind us that He loves most. 

And His good Word reminds us that His love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13).

God’s love is deep and wide. Human-kind can’t comprehend God. Perhaps we spend our lifetimes understanding His amazing grace. And then,

one day, we shall see Him, face to face.

Broken Path? Look up. Start over.

Our path on the picture in our minds is often straight. We don’t envision the bends and the breaks along the way. Though we don’t know the beginning from the end, it is comforting to know that God does . . .

So, instead of a continual cry over “spilt milk,” after a time of grief of loss, it’s time to look up.

The Bible is opened again, with a prayer and hope for comfort and a plan.

“What does God have to say? I open up to the beginning:

Genesis 1:1, “In the beginning God . . .”

“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” The earth was without form, and void; and darkness was on the face of the deep,” (Gen.1:1,2).

How many of us can say, “Yep, this says it all for me.

“There’s void. There’s darkness on the face of my heart, deep.”

Is this what life feels like now? And you wonder, How? Words like ‘void’ and ‘darkness’ describe all you are inside – so deep and painful.

The clock ticks on, responsibilities for the day don’t stop, but the heart inside cries like a never ending rain.

“God, revive me again,” is the cry through this night, and God speaks:
” And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters.”

The Spirit of God was hovering. The Spirit of God is here,  hovering over my tears.
Gen.1:3, Then God said, “Let there be light”; and there was light.

God said, “Let there be light.”

Somehow, my spirit is stirred, as if for the first time.

And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it, John 1:5,

Here I thought the Bible was telling me of stories long ago, but somehow, these words are only for me, right now.

You better believe, I don’t understand God when it’s dark and cold all around. But somehow, today, I’m willing to look up and see His light.

Even though I don’t understand all that goes on each day, I know He is faithful and loves me. I’m not happy in storms and my feet are torn by rough terrain, but somehow, today,

I’m sick of the failures. I’m tired of the night. I have to believe again.

Do you join me in this fight? Together let’s reap a new harvest and allow

God’s Word to speak:

Haven’t you known? Have you not heard? Has it not been told you from the beginning?” Isaiah 40:21.

We forget so easily, especially when our path has been severed and cut. We pray:   “God speak again and fill me with hope.”

Do you not know?
    Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
    the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
    and his understanding no one can fathom.
 He gives strength to the weary
    and increases the power of the weak.
 Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall;
 but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:28-31, NIV.

God’s Word. Read aloud, with heart soft and willing, hovers over the void and darkness and says, in the midst of the mystery, “Let there be light.”

Let’s turn around and find day. We’ve had enough night:

Comfort, comfort my people,
    says your God.
2 Speak tenderly to Jerusalem,
    and proclaim to her
that her hard service has been completed,
    that her sin has been paid for,
that she has received from the Lord’s hand
    double for all her sins.

3 A voice of one calling:
“In the wilderness prepare
    the way for the Lord[a];
make straight in the desert
    a highway for our God.

4 Every valley shall be raised up,
    every mountain and hill made low;
the rough ground shall become level,
    the rugged places a plain.
5 And the glory of the Lord will be revealed,
    and all people will see it together.
For the mouth of the Lord has spoken,” Isaiah 40.

The mouth of the Lord has spoken, and He has given me light. And you?

Today, we will go out with joy and be led forth in peace because the Spirit of the living God has fallen afresh on us. Together we pray,

“Jesus, fill us with Your Spirit. Refresh us today.”

Together in faith, we say,  “Amen. God is with me, and He’s guiding me. He knows all that concerns me. He’s protecting my way.”

 

We need each other

Truly my soul silently waits for God;

From Him comes my salvation.
 He only is my rock and my salvation;
He is my defense;
I shall not be greatly moved. 

Psalm 62
To the Chief Musician. To Jeduthun. A Psalm of David.

In all honesty, my soul waits for God. But silently? No, not always. At times it’s more like an ocean in a storm.

“I shall not be greatly moved,” David proclaims. Perhaps slightly moved he was because he continues his psalm:

 How long will you attack a man?
You shall be slain, all of you,
Like a leaning wall and a tottering fence.
 They only consult to cast him down from his high position;
They delight in lies;
They bless with their mouth,
But they curse inwardly. Selah

This is not a time of peace for David. Selah, or “pause and think quietly about it,” makes us consider for ourselves what these verses mean.

These thoughts of great trouble, confusion, and lies could be in regards to our own personal battles, or our family dynamics, dealing with people, or sickness and bills, or school, finances, or work, car troubles. Each of these can bring us down from a stable position.

The lies that come flooding in from the enemy, for me are:  “This is how’s it’s been, forever.” “This is how it will be forever.” “Nothing will ever change, this is all you have forever.”

The Word, a refuge. God speaks and instructs. What did David do?

He talks to his own soul. Psalm 62 proves to instruct me to do the same:

 My soul, wait silently for God alone,
For my expectation is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation;
He is my defense;

I shall not be moved. Psalm 62:5,6.

David is changed. I’m sure his circumstances haven’t changed. But he has changed.

How?

His eye focus changed to the only rock and salvation. Right now, is there anyone else who needs some corrective glasses, like me. I must focus up, o-n-l-y. Not once and forever, but step by step, moment by moment:

 In God is my salvation and my glory;
The rock of my strength,
And my refuge, is in God.

Change is going on. my heart is being moved to increased faith. Satan has no victory. But the next verse caught me by surprise. It no longer uses the word me, or I, but your and us:

Trust in Him at all times, you people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us. Selah

Pause and think quietly about this. “You people,” “your heart,” “God is a refuge for us.” We need community. We need each other.

We can all come together and agree, men, (women, all people,) will disappoint. We are all sinners. Not one is exempt from the fall. David writes:

 Surely men of low degree are a vapor,
Men of high degree are a lie;
If they are weighed on the scales,
They are altogether lighter than vapor.
 Do not trust in oppression,
Nor vainly hope in robbery;
If riches increase,
Do not set your heart on them.

But together, if we remind each other to “look up,” and focus on God, we will not be shaken.

God has spoken once,
Twice I have heard this:
That power belongs to God.
Also to You, O Lord, belongs mercy;
For You render to each one according to his work. Psalm 62.

How we need to talk of His power and mercy. His faithfulness. His grace. We can wait on God, together. We will say to our souls:

wait silently for God alone,
For our expectation is from Him.
He only is our rock and our salvation;
He is our defense;

We shall not be moved.

Selah, We will pause and think quietly about that!

A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24.

 

I want a garden of flowers, but the soil of my heart, needs work.

Soil, hard with clay and stone. A barren landscape. Plain. Forlorn. Similar to my heart, quite honestly, at times. Nothing will grow in this, except the weeds of discontent and misery.

But a shovel, some good soil and earth, a bit of sweat and great effort. And seeds of Truth and God’s Holy Word, can be received in the dirt to bring about hope.

The seeds are a promise. There’s now hope of refreshing fruit.

God speaks to His people so they understand difficult things:
“. . . unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed.

But if it dies, it produces many seeds,” John 12:24, NIV.

“If it dies, it produces,” produces and multiplies. Life and fruit overcome barrenness.  And life overcomes death, all because a seed fell to the ground and dies.

What can this mean for you and me? Is the soil of my heart open to hear? Or do I carry on without a care?

The mystery is clarified. God’s Word simplifies:

 In the past you were dead because you sinned and fought against God. 

You followed the ways of this world and obeyed the devil. He rules the world, and his spirit has power over everyone who doesn’t obey God.

 Once we were also ruled by the selfish desires of our bodies and minds. We had made God angry, and we were going to be punished like everyone else.

 But God was merciful!

We were dead because of our sins, but God loved us so much that he made us alive with Christ, and God’s wonderful kindness is what saves you.

Openness to the Word softens the heart. Receiving the seed, is death on our part. But God then can work miraculously and bring life out of death. Only God brings life.

God raised us from death to life with Christ Jesus, and he has given us a place beside Christ in heaven. 

 God did this so that in the future world he could show how truly good and kind he is to us because of what Christ Jesus has done. 

You were saved by faith in God, who treats us much better than we deserve. 

This is God’s gift to you, and not anything you have done on your own.

God gives the gift. We simply receive. If our hearts are soft like good soil, and simply Believe.

  It isn’t something you have earned, so there is nothing you can brag about.

 God planned for us to do good things and to live as he has always wanted us to live.

That’s why he sent Christ to make us what we are. Ephesians 2 Contemporary English Version. 

An old hymn comes to mind:

On a hill far away stood an old rugged cross,
  The emblem of suff’ring and shame,
And I love that old cross where the Dearest and Best
  For a world of lost sinners was slain.(1)

Soil worked, seed in the ground, sun and water required, seed then dies, but by miracle it seems, a sprout appears. Hope for fruit right before our eyes.

Promise of a flower, a tomato, or pear. And for me and you, the fruit of the Spirit, more love, more patience, and self-control and gentleness. The ability for faithfulness and joy. Do we desire kindness and peace? Do we have the ability to do good

“. . . unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, . . .” 

it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, . . .”

the fruit of love is spread all over.

On the old rugged Cross, stain’d with blood so divine
A wondrous beauty I see
For the dear Lamb of God, left his Glory above
To pardon and sanctify me
So I’ll cherish the old rugged Cross
Till my trophies at last I lay down
I will cling to the old rugged Cross
And exchange it some day for a crown
Like a beautiful garden, is that what we desire to be? Soft hearts, bearing fruit?
Seeking God to help keep out the weeds, until the time He calls us home:
To the old rugged Cross, I will ever be true
Its shame and reproach gladly bear
Then He’ll call me some day to my home far away
Where his glory forever I’ll share

The Old Rugged Cross, George Bennard, 1912

 

Word Weavers International. A Wonderful World of Word Wrestling to Bring God’s Way and Glory Back into Light

Has God put on your heart to write? And specifically, to the glory of God?  If the answer is yes, check to see if there is a local Word Weavers chapter in your area.

There is in mine.
I love the name, “Word Weavers.” However, for me, (and perhaps you), preparing for the casual meetings to gather with local writers with a piece of no more than 1500 words, “Word Wrestler” is a more appropriate name.

Word Weavers will inspire, instruct, and encourage. No one goes home crying. However, you might feel the need to go home and wrestle.

After our time together with “cold-sandwich” critique, (meaning, after your piece is read), words are spoken of what’s “sweet,” then they get to the “meat” and a bit of “let us” too, with some wrapping up without leaving you pickled.

Word Weavers is community. It provides homework, produces commitment, and offers a calendar of opportunity.
Check out to see if there’s a local Word Weavers in your area. What was the purpose for my little “commercial?”

Well, if it be true that we are created in the image of God, and it’s apparent that something’s terribly wrong. And blaming God or others doesn’t bring constructive change.

Then those who treasure the Word breathed by Him, must take courage and declare God’s glory with their pen-or their keys, or etc. (You know what I mean.)

What if it’s true that we’re in the “last days?” And the warnings of God were never read because of man’s rage?
Let’s do it. Let’s write. God Himself has stirred us up.
If there be but one Door. (1) (Which often angers men and brings out their worst.) Let’s proclaim what’s written, and give God back His voice. Then those who take a minute to read, . . .
might find themselves transformed by a “renewing” of the mind.(2)
“His will be done, not yours, not mine.
Do you have a story that brings glory to God? A novel. Fiction, non-fiction, devotions. Poetry, Children’s stories and picture books too. Word Weavers will welcome you in a world of “weaving” and “wrestling” for some.
Join us.
Let’s write.
And enjoy a “cold-sandwich” or two.
In obedience and courage, we will proclaim light.
God gives us choice. (A great love-gift from Him.)
But, it’s time to persuade man to turn back to God, because “as in the days of Noah,” the door was closed tight.
I’ll end my rough poetry with Matthew 24. And I hope I’ve encouraged you to enter a Word Weaver’s door:
 “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son,but only the Father.
 As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.
 For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark;  and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away.
That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.
 Two men will be in the field; one will be taken and the other left.
 Two women will be grinding with a hand mill; one will be taken and the other left.
“Therefore keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come.
 But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into.
 So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.
 “Who then is the faithful and wise servant, whom the master has put in charge of the servants in his household to give them their food at the proper time? . . .“(3)
Faithful and wise?
Food for thought, for you and me, always.
I hope to see you at the next local Word Weaver’s meeting.
 (1) John 10
(2) Romans 12:2
(3) Matthew 24: 36-46

Long and overdue, Honor for you, Mom

Mom, this is a letter of honor for you. Yes, long overdue. Oh, there were small moments of honor, but over-all, as a child and even as a young woman, I struggled to be honoring.

If I could have spent more time thinking on the good things and good reports. But my brain was prone to think on the lack, the imperfections, the cracks and nicks. Why did it take me so many years to understand that all this is part of my battle with sin.

I suppose the most relieving part, is, this is everyone’s battle, day in and day out. There is no escaping it, in our own strength. There’s only so far you can go with “the power of positive thinking.”

If I could have actually put in practice, “Do to mother, what you would have her do to you.” I might have, in the process, learned a thing or two about honoring you.

I was not your easy, compliant child. No, I was hard-headed, stubborn, temperamental, and angry. So much so, that being my last name was Born, you would often joke that my middle name was Stub. Toni Stub-Born.

Did I ever say “I’m sorry,” for all my Stub-Born-ness?  Well, “I’m sorry mom.”
I have a few “snapshot” memories. I was six or so, and I needed my tonsils out.

I remember crying and carrying on with loud cries and tears because I DID NOT want to go in some room that seemed to be a community room with lots of kids and parents. No!

I remember being put in a private-type room. And then after surgery, I was surrounded by stuffed animals, a new tooth brush, and tons of attention. Did I think I was a princess?

Yes, I believed I was a princess.

Another snapshot memory is the huge scene I made about “hating” my brand-new, (very fine, I might add), genuine leather sandals you bought for me and presented to me the day and moments before leaving for the Barnum and Bailey Circus, the Greatest Show on Earth.

I made a scene, almost to the point of missing the circus. But I wore the shoes, somehow, (I’m sure with great aggravation and struggle on your part), and forgot all about them after being struck with awe and wonder of the Three Rings, the lights and sparkle, the stilts, the elephants, the horses.

Did I realize that not every child had the opportunity to see the Barnum and Bailey Circus? Did I ever say I’m sorry for carrying on?

I’m sorry mom. And, thanks for taking me to the circus. I still remember it today, along with the leather sandals. I remember really liking them as time went on.

I didn’t have a thankful heart. I didn’t naturally think on the good and wonderful things you did for me. Instead, I was critical and had blaming thoughts.

Mom, I’m truly sorry for all this. Why’d it take 57 years for me to say this? You spent time with me to teach me to sew. And you were the one to introduce me to Calligraphy pens. You spent time with me giving me instruction in how to use them well.

To think Mom, it was you who put the seed in me for Calligraphy. I included a handful of the beautiful script that continually flows from my kids.

Thank you.

What about the music lessons? The painful moments listening to me sing. Then the huge investment in voice lessons. All for me. Mom, thank you for investing in me. Singing, playing instruments, teaching others the joy of playing. This is so much of my life today. All because you and dad invested in me.

Thank you. Thank you.

And the dance lessons at the Glenda Falk Studio. It was like a second home. You and dad flipped the bill. Endless hours dancing giving me the heart to dream for a future of musical comedy.

Thank you Mom.

And remember, after your rare trip to NYC, when you brought home the album for “A Chorus Line.” Forget about it, I had a dream to go to NYC and audition for that show. And I did!

I wasn’t cast, but it’s crazy to actually think of all that now.

You were an example of taking healthy herbs and living in moderation. But there was not a moderate bone in my body. I was a powerhouse of energy and  hard-headedness, smart, opinionated, and, . . . how you must have cringed at all my hidden insecurities.

I will write now, something I’ve never spoken aloud, but I remember at age 6 or 7, when I drank from my first Coke-a-cola, in the small glass bottle. Like a magnet, the sugar had a grip on me.

What’s all that about? It was an impulsive-compulsiveness growing inside of me, (probably from the day I was born, only to learn later, we’re all born with a bent to sin). Well, you watched it. The craziness of an eating disorder throughout my high school years, and sad to say, it wasn’t until I was 20  before I could finally admit I had a serious problem.

I didn’t know how to eat. I would eat anything and think, “I ate too much,” only to then binge and eat the entire box! Or, I would look in the mirror and think, “I’m so fat.” An insanity was growing inside my mind.
But underneath all that eating and binging, exercising and dance class madness, were huge insecurities, negative thoughts, and an internal angry mess.

I was searching spiritually in High-School, and God was watching me.

I remember looking into the huge, vast, Arizona sky, (because there weren’t huge trees to block the view, just a Saguaro Cactus or so), and “talking to God.”

He heard me.

He sent my dance teacher, my Key Club friends, kids from cheer and FCA to be a witness to me. I made some efforts of change trying to get religion. Doing this thing and that, but it was all effort without . . .

. . . my whole heart. I didn’t have a relationship with Jesus, I was inwardly a mess, still the pilot of my ship.

But no-one could tell, it was all hidden inside.

I auditioned for the American Academy Arts. I got accepted and off I went to the big CA! I did fine for a few years, setting goals and moving forward. Musicals, Summer Stock, in my own energy and strength, and outward courage, after my Exam Plays at the California school, I asked to transfer, if accepted to the  American Academy of Dramatic Arts, NY School.

I was able to say, “American Academy of Dramatic Arts NYC, Here I come.”

An Arizona girl in the big NYC. The dream to dance and study voice and act- Yes, I was living a dream!

But mom, as time went on,I couldn’t overcome my eating disorder. It got so much worse.

No one could really tell from the outside. This was a hidden struggle.

 

The insecurities mounted. The anger. The fear. I couldn’t fly home. I had to get it right, right there.

I was reading “Out on a Limb,” by Shirley MacClaine. I sought New Age wisdom, only to be left short of any victory to overcome my compulsive, self-destructive behavior.

My life had become unmanageable.

I needed a Savior. And God found me and He rescued me, in the big NYC. You see, an alcoholic can do a twelve step program and stop drinking, but with eating disorders, you’ve got to learn to eat.

God helped me, to literally, eat. First, through 12 steps, and then continually to learn Who it was that I “made the decision to turn my will and my life over to His care.”

The Bible became my main read!

I was His girl, and He was always with me. He helped me conquer and heal completely my angers, day by day, and my insecurities. I often would think, because this was in that era, of Karen Carpenter, who didn’t get the help in time. That reminded me, this is important.

I gave my life to Jesus, He helped me to finally stand on my own two feet.
Anger was my real issue, and moment by moment, with my mind in His word, my heart seeking His way, and the Spirit leading, He helped me overcome addiction.

He’s still helping me.

So, Mom, I suppose in honoring you today, I write what seems to be a book. A thousand words, plus, but it’s time mom.

And I wanted you to know all this.

And you know, this NYC girl was never going to get married or have kids, (before this change and new relationship with the Lord and allowing Him to pilot my ship).

God had plans unlike mine. He had me meet Mike, and showed me, “This is the one.”

We married and  had a few children, . . . or eleven.

I know, you thought your girl had lost her mind. Yes, quite frankly. But they’re all your grand-kids!

As a mom, I try to do my best, and mom, you did your best too. So I want to say today, I’m sorry for all the grief I caused your heart. And thank you, from the bottom of my heart for your love and your endless support.

I could write so much more, but bottom line, it’s long over-due, mom. “Thank you.”

I hope you are blessed as you watch our kids grow. And I hope your heart swells a bit  knowing you started the Calligraphy trend, many years ago, when you took the time to teach me how to use a Calligraphy pen.

I’m thankful, that even though I moved away from AZ at 18, social media helps us share pictures and moments, and we don’t have to feel so far away.

I love you mom. I honor you, hopefully better everyday.

Your far-away, and (thankfully) a bit less hard-headed and stubborn girl,

Toni

 

 

For Now and Again #2 Letters for Jenny’s girls…

Introduction: These letters are for Jenny’s girls. Who’s Jenny. (Read Remembering Jenny Pt.1.

Jenny was a swim mom who faced the crisis of becoming paralyzed, unable to move her arms, her legs, to breathe on her own. The first year was of facing the crisis, and all that entails for a family of 5,  learning to live in her new condition, remodeling the home, purchasing a wheel-chair accessible vehicle, and coming home to 24/7 home health care.

Growing in faith, in hope and love as she faced day in and day out for almost 6  years in this condition.

 

 

Dear girls, I share this letter with you, about a hero of mine, yes, happens to  your mom.

When I have a hard day and I feel the impulse to quit or be depressed, I think of your mom. Each morning she chose willingly. Presenting her body as a living sacrifice to God, (Romans 12:1). 

Unable to move a muscle, yet totally willing and trusting in God’s healing hand, over a very long period of time. We’re not talking weeks, or long months, we’re talking years.

You see, what made your mom so special was how she was thinking.

She must have wrestled with God, (ironic, someone who couldn’t move a muscle, but was all “life” in mind and heart).

Wrestling with God, she appeared to be one who prayed as Jacob: “I won’t let go until You bless me,”(Gen. 32:24).

Your mom told me the first time I came to the house to visit, after 5 years of being paralyzed: “I consider it a privilege that God would choose me to go through this, and put me in this chair.” (She had one special wheelchair.)

I almost think I should write the word Selah, meaning pause and think about this after this statement.  She used the word privilege when talking about being paralyzed from the neck down.  Needing assistance of a respirator to breathe. Privilege that she was chosen to suffer so much loss.

I am so sorry for all the loss you girls have had to experience as well. The hugs you will receive in heaven. They will never end.

Your mom also told me, “I always loved God, even from a young age, but since I’ve been ‘in the chair’  God is so close to me. The closeness is indescribable.” And there is huge evidence of this.

I would not be writing word after word if this were not so.

I truly believe that when I hear encouragement to have an intimate relationship with Jesus, I think of your mom and her relationship with Him.

The Bible tells us that He will keep you in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Him (Is. 26:3).

Your mom’s mind was on god and His will and ways. She had a deep peace that passed all understanding, (Phil4).

These choices are noteworthy.

And when talking about the struggles in her marriage, (as, every married person has struggles in marriage), she never complained one bit.

Not one ounce, nada, nothing.

She simply asked me, “Have you ever read the book called  The Power of a Praying Wife?  Your mom was not able to run fast in body, but she quick to run to God in prayer.

And we had many opportunities to pray those wonderful prayers right from that book, because of your mom’s great disability, it seemed as if your mom had these prayers memorized. 

God was using your mom to help me in so many ways.

And when things weren’t really going her way, while waiting in a hospital bed for week upon week, unable to find health care to get back home,

“Can we pray that when Joe comes, that he will see that I am concerned about him and all that is going on in his life with the girls?” 

Now girls, I am sure that you’ve heard, that when mamas not happy, ain’t nobody’s happy. Not with your mama, instead of being absorbed in her own grief of seeming unanswered prayer, she prayed that she would be focused and concerned with your dad and you.

Girls, this is what a most beautiful woman looks like.

God had done a work in her. I think that is where the word glorious fits in.

The Bible does tell us that “We are His workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.” (Eph. 2:10).

Your mom couldn’t walk, but follow Jesus, she did.

And in that hospital room, Rm. 609, in which she found herself for weeks on end, she asked me if I would call the elders from her church to come to anoint her with oil and pray the prayer of healing over her. She continually said, “God told me that I was going to walk again.” 

The elders of the church did come. They prayed, and still, your mom, silently hoped and waited. She was an example of acceptance with joy. That’s why I write these letters, “for now and again.”

Your mom hoped in God, she believed what He said. Period.

She waited, with tears that she couldn’t wipe from her own face, she believed:

 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”Jer. 29:11-13.

S.H. Spurgeon wrote a little poem, and your mom’s story makes me think of it: “Put thou thy trust in God; In duty’s path go on; Fix on Himself thy steadfast eye, So shall thy work be done.”

“Though years on years roll on, His mercy shall endure; Though clouds and darkness hide His path, His promised grace is sure.”

On the very last visit I had with your mom, (which I had no idea it would be,) she told me, “Toni, I have some homework for you. I want you to learn a  song.” So I asked, “What song is that?” She answered, in that whisper voice she had, “It is well with my soul.”

“OK Jenny, I’ve got that one, for next time.”

I never got a chance to sing it with her, but at least now I know the song she left singing:

“When peace like a river, Attendeth my way, When sorrows, Like sea billows roll; whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, “It is well, It is well, with my soul.” It is well, with my soul, It is well, it is well, with my  soul.”

“My sin, O the bliss Of this glorious tho’t. My sin not in part But the whole Is nailed to the cross And I bear it no more, Praise the Lord, Praise the Lord, O my soul!” 

And, Lord, haste the day When my faith shall be sight, The clouds be rolled back like a scroll! The trumpet shall sound and the Lord shall descend, “Even so, it is well With my soul.  It is well, with my soul, it is well,

it is well with my soul.”

Girls, I hurt for you in that you miss your mom so much. I know these letters may bring tears, but I pray they fill your heart with love and comfort, For now and again.

With love,

Toni Rypkema

Remembering Jenny Part 1

Reasons
You will write the book, Jenny encouraged me.
I told Jenny  I wanted to write a devotional called God’s Hand. Sometimes I would read to her my WordPress posts. I would write what the Lord showed me that day in His word.

Anyway, I write now a series of articles about Jenny. God knew I needed a her friendship. I’m changed when I remember the time we had together. I believe everyone needs to meet Jenny. So I write.

Jenny became completely paralyzed, a tetraplegic, within only a 24 hour period, at 34 years of age. She lost the movement of every part of her body, even her ability to breathe on her own.

She told me, from the very first day when she didn’t even know what was happening to her, she felt God had told her, You’ll be able to walk again.
Jenny believed God.

She couldn’t hold on to anything. But Jenny held on to God and His promises. Her faith remained strong, even after more than 5 years of loss upon loss.

Yes, even after more than 5 years. How do I know? Because, God allowed us to be friends her last year on this earth, and I witnessed faith in champion proportions. After all that time of physical loss and emotional strain and difficulty, Jenny would have the excuse to be bitter, discouraged, impatient, and angry, but she was none of those things.

She was hopeful, patient, gentle, caring, and faithful.

Do you know what she told me the first time I visited her at her house, while she sat in her chair. She said, The very first day I was paralyzed, I asked God to help me get out of bed every day.

She said, He helps me everyday. This woman couldn’t move anything, yet she got out of bed, so to speak, everyday.

God knew that I needed a friend who kept her faith and believed God, no matter what. Day after day, trial after trial, this is what Jenny so victoriously did.  We needed each other.

Jenny was my cure to stop complaining about my nothing in comparison problems. When I was tempted to look at mountains of situations, instead of looking to God, I would remember Jenny.

Beginnings
There were days when, just thinking of her and the extreme challenges she had to face every minute of the day, got me out of bed.

I had suffered great loss. My heart physically felt it was bleeding. Did we even know that the heart can feel like it’s bleeding.

I needed a hero, a champion. Jenny was all that, but don’t think for a minute that Jenny’s the hero I’m writing about. Right from the start, the hero is God.

I started praying for Jenny years before when on the very same week, on a February of 2008, I had a diagnosis of Rheumatoid Arthritis. But Jenny became paralyzed. Within a 24 hour period—quadriplegic.

Jenny also lost the use of her diaphragm, thus leaving her in need of a respirator. Breath by breath there was struggle to survive.
And, the three girls. Jenny couldn’t hug anymore. Twins in their teens and the youngest only 6.

I had nothing to complain about. What is Rheumatoid Arthritis, swelling and pain when moving, to paralysis of every limb and chest.

Debilitating changes
It all happened so quickly. February, 2008 brought change for the both of us, but for Jenny, she couldn’t move anything.
Was sudden paralysis of the spine due to a virus? Did the medical team ever really know? There were so many questions for Jenny, her husband, and her three girls. Questions that couldn’t be answered.

I thought about Jenny every day even though I didn’t know her well when all the changes happened.
I would reach for a cup out of the cupboard, after getting up and walking out of bed. Tempted to complain of difficulties of life and my RA pain, which seemed to come so naturally, but then I would stop.

Almost as if I was watching myself from the outside, I would fill the cup with water and give myself a drink, then I would think, . . .  Remember Jenny.
A young mom from the Y, with her girls on the same swim team as mine, and all of a sudden, word goes out, “Jenny’s paralyzed.”

I was cured.
Perspective is everything. I had no problems at all. Zero. None.

I can’t even imagine being 34 years old and not being able to move anything. Prayers went up to God for Jenny everywhere for her girls, her husband, and family.

Day after day.

Month after month.

Year after year.

I am not sure how long she was hospitalized, 8 months and more. And then training and preparation for life as a quadriplegic. A special chair was needed as well as 24/7 home health care. The house had to be renovated for the chair to go up stairs. A new van was purchased. The entire dynamics of the household was forever changed.

Jenny couldn’t hug her girls anymore.

The girls would always smile when I gave them a little wave as they walked past me on the bleachers, to swim practice. What a great thing to have a pool to kick off all the stress and hardship of life for an hour.

I remember watching her blow into a long straw-type tube to move her special wheel chair into the Y. We would have chats now and again.

I asked her, “Jenny, what’s the hardest part of all this?” Putting my hand on her hand. With great effort to catch breath, she answered me,
“People put their hands on my hand. They think they’ve touched me. I can’t feel my hands.”

I gently pulled my hand away. I remember saying, “I’m sorry Jenny.”
She couldn’t do anything. Not even breathe on her own. This is more loss than I can comprehend. But Jenny had faith that God was going to heal her. She was waiting on Him with joy and hope.

Time went on. I had a cancer diagnosis. A cancer fight with the struggles of chemo, surgery, hormone block treatments, the ups the downs, the all-arounds. And I would “remember Jenny.”

November of 2012, and I was driving my kids to school.
This was first year of school for my elementary and middle school aged children. I was a home-educator for 21 years, however the stress involved and the weakness I was dealing with gave way to public education for my kids.

We were in the car and the radio announcer posed a question,
“Is there someone very important in your life, and they might not even know it? Let this Thanksgiving be the time to let them know.”

“Jenny” was my thought.

So I found Jenny’s phone number and I called. I remembered Jenny every day, and I began visiting her home periodically.

This was four and-a-half years after the paralysis began.

A friendship developed
The first time I visited Jenny was a bit uncomfortable as I waited at the door at 10:30 in the morning for what seemed like a long time. I stood at the door, but then one of the home-health nurses let me in.

They were blow-drying her hair. I can’t imagine the amount of work every day to tend to all the needs of a young woman who can’t move or breathe on her own.
Jenny seemed so happy to have a visitor. And I was happy to be finally visiting. I came with my guitar. She really didn’t know me at all except for a few conversations at the Y and the call for Thanksgiving.

I felt I needed to thank her for many things.
This woman got me out of bed. This woman gave me courage and perspective. This woman taught me to be thankful.

Quite honestly I wonder how many lives this woman actually saved? I know God used her to save me from my pitiful thinking. From thinking thoughts that would were faith-less and fret-full.

Jenny had a gentle spirit and joyful nature, even after almost five years of circumstantial loss. She couldn’t pull her bangs down to fix them up. She couldn’t take a sip from a cup.

She couldn’t do anything!

I am sure in her quiet moments there was sadness and loneliness, but her faith lifted her. She believed God was going to heal her. She believed this with every ounce of her being.
This is the woman that should be on the cover of magazines of what a “beautiful woman” is.

I brought my guitar for a time of worship and prayer. We sang. Jenny cried. Her respirator buzzer kept going off because of the extra air needed. And we prayed.
When Jenny spoke out of the abundance of her heart, you would think there would be bitterness, frustration, anger, and complaint. But I will tell you right here and now, out of the abundance of this woman’s heart, who had lost so much, was one thing, grace poured out.

Not complaint, but gracious words. She shared, “He’s going to heal me. He told me at the beginning, when this first happened. He said to my spirit, “You’re going to walk again.”
Jenny believed God. From day one to year five, completely paralyzed.
“The Lord has let my legs still have muscle tone. They aren’t supposed to have that. “I’m going to walk again,” she told me with complete faith.
I asked Jenny of her favorite memory verse.

“Be still, and know that I am God” Psalm 46:10
She would joke how she spoke with God, “Lord, I’m not going anywhere!”
You probably think I’m writing nice words about a friend. No, I’m writing about seeing a miracle of God
This woman was overflowing with faith, and hope, and I haven’t even mentioned the love.
God did this.

He was present. I was a witness of a life filled with the Spirit and submitted to Him.
Jenny’s home health care ran out after a little over five and a half years. She found herself back in the very same hospital that she spent so many months in almost 6 years prior.
This was her greatest fear. At 40 years of age.

But God gave us time together in the hospital reading the Bible together and singing songs. The girls will never know what God did for both of us in opening His word together, I thought, unless I write the words.

So, letters for the girls were written. But they aren’t just for the girls. (I will share them as “Letters to the girls,” in further posts.)

For “Now and again”, Letters to Jenny’s girls…

Introduction: These are letters to Jenny’s Girls. Who’s Jenny? Read “Remembering Jenny, Pt.1” Jenny was a young woman, 34 years of age who became completely paralyzed, a quadriplegic, only able to turn her neck within a 24 hour period by a mysterious virus, etc. She was a gift to me. A witness of the sufficient grace of God.

Letter #1

Writing –  because God has put it on my heart. Yes, ever since I was diagnosed with cancer, the Lord has me writing.

But for Sue, Al, and Jan, the Lord has me putting together for you, letters about your mom, Jenny, Oh girls,  I write because your mom was one of the most beautiful women ever.

You see, people are caught up with outside appearances, and magazines are filled with pictures of beautiful women, but your mom was exceptional in beauty that matters. Beauty of the heart. God doesn’t look at the outside of a person, but at the heart.

I believe your mom was one of God’s most victorious treasures.

Life is filled with a lot of blessings as well as a lot of troubles, but God holds each of us in His Hands, through it all, the good and the bad. He’s always with us.

God’s word tells us so.

And what’s crazy about it all, is, it seems that we don’t even experience God’s hand , and don’t grow in discovering that we are actually held in His hand,  until after we have been at our lowest, after times of great pain, after suffering, heartache and loss.

it’s then that we discover God’s hand holding us up. There’s no strength left on our  own.

You and your family have gone through extreme trial.   I’m  sorry you girls have had to suffer so.

Your mother was exceptional. She continually gave her disappointments to God and took courage with the challenges she faced. She made the choice . . .

to surrender to His will in everything.

She couldn’t move. Nothing. Nada.

You girls were her life. She asked God to “get her out of bed everyday,” for each of you. She never gave up on God. Even when it seemed as if He wasn’t hearing her prayers.

He was faithful to lift her faith as if she had wings as eagles, by His Spirit. You witnessed it, I know you did. And I did too. So I write so we can remember, “now and again.” Your mom had faith that reached the heavens, believing God.

Not being able to  do anything, because her body shut down on her, she did the best thing. Believing God, with excellence.

This woman was your mama.

 

It seems that after great pain, we are made ready to actually receive great joy. We witness this every time a newborn baby is born. And after sickness, we often times are made ready to become “healed” in so many areas in our lives, (even in some areas that we didn’t even know were sick).

Your mom suffered greatly, but drew closer and closer to God, and guess what? He drew closer and closer to her. So beautifully close, with sweet intimacy that your mom was ‘filled’ with His Spirit.

Exceedingly, abundantly.

Her very heart shined like Ps. 103: “Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits: Who forgives all your iniquities, who heals all of your diseases, who redeems your life from destruction, who crowns you with lovingkindness and tendermercies; who satisfies your mouth with good things; so that your youth is renewed like the eagles…”

God became so close to your mom, that what I witnessed, was His sufficient grace,  literally “made her bed.”

Your mom knew that many  nurses would see her and feel sadfor her. But your mom had a prayerful heart and communed with God so much that she felt sad for them. For their heaviness of trial without faith.

She was thankful and in full expectation of God.

Your mom had the joy of the Lord. (In case you ever wondered what that looked like.) Don’t get me wrong, she told me about her struggles with doubt, but she knew where to run. Your mom couldn’t walk or stand, but she ran a marathon of faith as she trusted God, even without seeing results, and she continually hoped in Him.

Your mom’s cry was much like David’s in Ps. 62:1, “Truly my soul silently waits for God. From Him comes my salvation. He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be greatly moved.”

Yes, so much silence, so much waiting, and she couldn’t move and make things happen, but because God was her Rock, she was not ‘greatly moved.’ God met her and gave her His grace which is all sufficient, and she victoriously calmed and quieted herself much like David once again:

“My soul, wait silently for God alone, For my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvaiton; He is my defense; I shall not be moved.” Ps. 62:5,6.

So, I told your mom that I was writing a book called God’s Hand. That God had put on my heart to write and He confirmed it with His word: “write in a book for yourself the things I have shown you in My word, (Jer. 33:1). I have someone who encouraged the Bible journaling, and I have someone who encouraged the writing, but I told your mom, that she was the “feet” to move this to completion.

She would smile and say, “It will get written.”

Little did I know, that God would simply show me His treasure, your mom,  and He would have me write her story.

The last hymn I sang with your mother was,  “I Surrender All.”

Your mom had feet that couldn’t even wiggle, but she is the “feet” to my writing.

For almost 6 years, she was tried and tested in all things,  with many cuts allowed to be made in this diamond. And shine, shine, shine she did with faith, hope, and love.

Your dear mom has gone home to be with her Lord. She was hoping that He would heal her so she could be here with you, but it was His will that she go to be with Him instead.

Oh, but she lives on, in each of you, and many others too.  It was Nov. 9th, 2013. It was  February of 2008, her body would not move, but Jenny let God mover her, every step of the way.

Now she dances in His presence.

I wrote quite a bit of our times with the Lord, your mother and me, so I would like to share them with you,  in letters. For now and again, you can read one, to cry or take courage or just cuddle with.

Because in life, “it’s not how you start, it’s how you finish” that matters, and your mama, . . .she finished amazingly well.

Be blessed and filled with an abundance of comfort,

Toni Rypkema

A Moment’s Getaway, Like a River Glorious

Like a River Glorious

In the old church hymnal, Frances Havergal, paints a moving picture with song, yet with a constant under-girding of calm.

Like a river glorious, Is God’s perfect peace, Over all victorious In it’s bright increase;

Perfect, yet it floweth Fuller every day, Perfect, yet it groweth Deeper all the way.

Stayed upon Jehovah, Hearts are fully blest; Finding as He promised, Perfect peace and rest. 

Like a river glorious, is God’s perfect peace!
Hidden in the hollow Of His blessed hand, Never foe can follow Never traitor stand;

Not a surge of worry, Not a shade of care, Not a blast of hurry Touch the Spirit there.

“Then, like a river glorious I desire to be. Moving steadily on, Dear Lord, in trust of Your security. Hide me in the hollow of Your great hand, mighty.

Reliable and more.
This world spins out of control leaving me fatigued and confused. Take me the way I am. Move me, like a river glorious.

Transform me, because You can—through Your gracious and gentle Hand.

Perfect, yet it floweth Fuller every day, Perfect, yet it groweth Deeper all the way.

Peace. Rest. Victorious. Bright increase. Words speak. As the stars across the heavens at night. As an abundance of roses on a stem. Wherever I may be, Lord, let this hymn energize me to believe.”

Could it be? Words, lead me, to my refuge and help? The pages in a hymnal read aloud. A remedy constant to revive. I turn to it’s page. I find Rock of Ages, on the other side.

Rock of Ages, cleft for me let me hide myself in Thee.”

The Lord is speaking. He is ministering to me. Like a River Glorious, a Rock of Ages that I might hide. Two different pictures, bringing about a solid theme, that wherever I go, I am being held and protected from Fear and Anxiety, two of my greatest foes.

Peace came to this furious world. Willing to allow the water and the blood from His wounded side to flow. . .  His death gives life to me, and all the people of the world, who see.

Like a River Glorious.

These words are living. Hymns teach of hope! Refreshment and revival. “Stayed on Jehovah, hearts fully blest! Finding, as He promised, Perfect peace and rest!”

Moving forward, constant. Like a River Glorious. Yet, Stayed on Jehovah, our mighty God, Hidden in the hollow Of His blessed hand, Never foe can follow, Never traitor stand.

To this morning meditation, let all the people say, “Amen.”

Holding Fast. A Prayer for Today

“This world, this wilderness, this desert place— where You watch our steps, it’s ruthless and rough, scary and often-times, a disgrace. This world, O Lord, that You ‘so loved.’ You sent Your precious Son that the people might see  with their eyes, and experience Love.

But at each turn, moment by moment, for us, (and 2,000 years ago, for You, Jesus), there’s strife, accusing, and distrust. This world is broken with edges that are sharp. So often, Lord, our hearts are left bleeding all over the place.
You know all about that, and remind us: My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. (1)

Pour out that ‘sufficient grace’, Lord. Give us ears open, for listening. Give our hearts increased understanding:
I am coming quickly; hold fast what you have, so that no one may rob you and deprive you of your crown. Revelation 3:11.

God, these words seem at times, foreign and distant. What do we have? How do we hold fast? Remind me of the crown. What’s the meaning of all this?
The old folks are weary, fighting to persevere. The children are caught in a cultural fast-paced race. Your Book is open. We will be still, and hear:

These are the words of the Holy One, the True One, He Who has the key of David, Who opens and no one shall shut, Who shuts and no one shall open.
Oh, Lord, in awe and reverence, we are listening, with the Book open in Revelation 3:

I know your [record of] works and what you are doing. See! I have set before you a door wide open, which no one is able to shut; I know that you have but little power, and yet you have kept My Word and guarded My message, and have not renounced or denied My name. (2)

But God, You can see that I have not always kept Your Word. Please forgive me. You see my shame. Wash me new, today. Help my eyes acknowledge the work You have done for me:

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, Psalm 103. (3)

Yes, I see a door in my mind, open, with Your nail-pierced hands before me. You speak ever gently, Remember Me.
Flooding now in my memory from Your Word: Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me, all the days of my life . . . Psalm 23. (4)

And then a hymn comes cleansing me:

I will arise and go to Jesus
He will embrace me in His arms
In the arms of my dear Savior
Oh, there are ten thousand charms (5)
Dear Lord, the Welcome mat to Your house of Love is often an Hymn from so long ago:
Come, ye thirsty, come and welcome
God’s free bounty glorify
True belief and true repentance
Every grace that brings you nigh
Come, ye weary, heavy-laden
Lost and ruined by the fall
If you tarry ’til you’re better
You will never come at all
He who overcomes [the world through believing that Jesus is the Son of God], I will make him a pillar in the temple of My God; he will most certainly never be put out of it, and I will write on him the name of My God, and the name of the city of My God, the new Jerusalem, which descends out of heaven from My God, and My [own] new name. 
 He who has an ear, let him hear and heed what the Spirit says to the churches.’ (6)
Today, as if it were my first. Today, as if it were my last:
I will arise and go to Jesus
He will embrace me in His arms
In the arms of my dear Savior
Oh, there are ten thousand charms (5)

(1) 2 Corinthians 12:9.
(2) Revelation 3:7-8.
(3) Psalm 103:2-4.
(4) Psalm 23:6.
(5) I Will Arise and Go To Jesus/ Joseph Hart/ 1759.
(6) Revelation 3:12,13.

Lord, Give us a Fragrance of Light and Peace

What is our fragrance as we go about our day?

Do we smell of fear and let doubt lead the way?
Like a skunk that’s afraid, pray we are not near.

Or as a pig slopping in a muddy mess, doing only as he pleases, “Dear Lord, save us from the stench of selfishness. May displeasing You, be our greatest dread and fear.”

“Dear Lord, give those who claim to know Your name, a cleansing stream, an emptying. That newness of life and acceptance with joy, peace like a river would splash on us a fragrance of Light.”

Today, a meditation on words penned almost a hundred years ago; Ina D. Ogden, “Speak your exhortation to ears ‘poor in spirit'”:

Do not wait until some deed of greatness you may do,
Do not wait to shed your light afar;
To the many duties ever near you now be true,
Brighten the corner where you are.

Brighten the corner where you are!
Brighten the corner where you are!
Someone far from harbor you may guide across the bar;
Brighten the corner where you are!

What kind of fragrance do we bring in the room? Is it a critical spirit. Thinking we know what’s right? “Dear Lord, reveal to us our failure and sin, that we might ask forgiveness and let Your light shine in us again.”

Perhaps the brokenness and deep hurts will prove to be, a place where we might have a gentle spirit and compassion. Perhaps God will help us have a tender spirit, gracious, gentle, a-c-c-e-p-t-i-n-g.

When pain comes, and darkness, we are tested and tried. Are we going to believe the Good Word only, when things go right?

Oh, to believe that “The LORD is righteous in all his ways and faithful in all he does,” Psalm 145:17.

Oh, how we are tested during times of loss, to believe:

Just above are clouded skies that you may help to clear,
Let not narrow self your way debar;
Though into one heart alone may fall your song of cheer,
Brighten the corner where you are.

The Lord is my strength and my song;
    he has become my salvation, Psalm 118:14.

This is the phrase I must sing. Let us today, wake up in faith, knowing, that God is with us. Let’s forget about ourselves and allow His light to beam:

Here for all your talent you may surely find a need,
Here reflect the bright and Morning Star;
Even from your humble hand the Bread of Life may feed,
Brighten the corner where you are.

A fragrance of light. A fragrance of peace. The Lord Jesus will take our burdens so today, we are free to sing:
Brighten the corner where you are!
Brighten the corner where you are!
Someone far from harbor you may guide across the bar;
Brighten the corner where you are!

Let us go now, in increased faith, to love and consider others and be a fragrance worth . . . remembering.

A Blind Woman’s Calling was to Help the World to See

A blind woman could see much more than most of us dream. She couldn’t see color, or line, or form, but she had eyes to see the Lord.
Her heart would write scores of words to increase our vision and understanding of the Lord.

Fanny Crosby teaches devotion to God as we open old hymns and speak them and sing.

We weep on earth when loved ones pass, but in the LORD, hope continues on. Saved by Grace, 1891, Fanny’s chorus repeats confident and strong:

And I shall see Him face to face,
And tell the story—-Saved by grace; 
And I shall see Him face to face,
And tell the story—-Saved by grace. 

Who is He that she longs to see. Our hearts long to read on and hear her words because we are born into this broken world, and in the midst of happy moments and and fun and life, there are great hurts. Great losses threaten to shadow all delight.

But God, He’s there. He asks quietly, “Do you believe?”

“Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit.  Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit.  You should not be surprised at my saying, ‘You  must be born again.’  The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit,” John 3:5-9.

With God, at times it seems all mystery. But Fanny writes of her Lord to show us the end before the beginning:

Some day the silver cord will break,
And I no more as now shall sing;
But oh, the joy when I shall wake
Within the palace of the King!

This is hope. What does it all mean? Does God put this hunger in us all that we search for answers that we might see and know?

Some day my earthly house will fall,
I cannot tell how soon ’twill be;
But this I know-—my All in All
Has now a place in heav’n for me.

Can I know? Without a doubt? How can I know that I will see the Lord face to face. How could Fanny write with such confidence of God’s grace?

And I shall see Him face to face,
And tell the story—-Saved by grace;
And I shall see Him face to face,
And tell the story—-Saved by grace.

We are born as a baby, but before our death, is there a birth that must take place? Is this the meaning of this mystery?
A day in our life, either early or late, we must look up to Jesus, God’s Son Whom He has sent. A second birth? It is on that day, we look up and choose to say, “I believe in all You did for me on the cross.”

“Take my sin and all my misery. Empty me that I might be filled with You. Give me new life today. Fill me with Your Spirit now, and for every day.”
Then the chorus Fanny wrote will be our song of hope that we sing with heart’s strong.

Some day, when fades the golden sun
Beneath the rosy-tinted west,
My blessed Lord will say, “Well done!”
And I shall enter into rest.

All because of the grace of God through Jesus.
Fanny wrote, that years later I could remain confident and sing until the very end:

Some day: till then I’ll watch and wait,
My lamp all trimmed and burning bright,
That when my Savior opes the gate,
My soul to Him may take its flight.

Amen, Amen. Fanny would have us speak joyfully her chorus again:
And I shall see Him face to face,
And tell the story—-Saved by grace;
And I shall see Him face to face,
And tell the story—-Saved by grace.

True Riches: Faith in God through Jesus His Son

Earthly riches we see and often desire. And once acquired, there is almost always, the let down: “Is that all there is?”

But Jesus, who came to be Savior, was also the unparalleled Teacher. He, Wisdom came down and spoke to ears that would hear:

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal,  but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. 
For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also,” Matthew 6:19-21.

The heavenly treasure of faith in God through Jesus His Son is higher and deeper, richer and forever. “Blessed—happy, fortunate, prosperous and enviable—is the man . . . whose delight and desire are . . .

What comes next? What’s this key to happiness? What makes a man “fortunate?”

What is possessed by the man or woman who is “prosperous and enviable?”
The possession of the glorious key to open the closed-door of Peace is faith in God through Jesus His Son.

Lasting. Forever. Promises enduring:

“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ,  through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God,” Romans 5:1,2.

This sounds rich. This rings glorious, but can we understand what it all means?”
“Give us faith. Help us understand the glory of God!” We pray. And . . .
He does.
Having faith to call out to God and pray, the Bible says, is all pleasing:

“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him,” Hebrews 11:6.

Heavenly riches, heavenly rewards—this is what I desire. You and me alike?
Just as if I have never sinned, my Jesus sees me now. Faith in what He did for me on the cross is the beginning of riches and glory and hope for all eternity for me, and you, and anyone who believes.

The Bible says it. The Bible is truth.

“Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him,” Proverbs 30:5.

Let us sing in our hearts, even in the midst of sorrow and loss, praises to God, because God will build in us a character that counts:

“Faith God, in Your Son who suffered and died. We stand at the foot of the cross and ask for help that we may at this time,

“glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;  perseverance, character; and character, hope.
 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us,” Romans 5:3-5.

To the One whose name is “Faithful and True,” (Revelation 19:11), no matter what happens, help us remember time and again, that the greatest of riches is faith and trust in You. Thank You for giving us the key of faith to unlock the door of Peace with each breath we take.

Amen, and Amen. Shall we continually say, “Let it be, and to Your glory. Let it be.

Blessed is the man whose, “delight is in the law of the Lord,
And on His law [His precepts and teachings] he [habitually] meditates day and night.
And he will be like a tree firmly planted [and fed] by streams of water,
Which yields its fruit in its season;
Its leaf does not wither;
And in whatever he does, he prospers [and comes to maturity], Psalm 1, Amplified.”

Believing. In God. According to His Word, indeed reaps True riches. Lasting. Forever.